lost in translation

Here's a riddle for you. I started watching Prison Break yesterday, which is an English TV show that my friend bought while she was in Vietnam. The first time my friend watched it, she accidentally left the subtitles on, but once she started watching, she realised how ridiculously wrong all of the subtitles were. We figure that they probably translated the show into Vietnamese, then a Vietnamese person wrote English subtitles for the show (we can still watch the show with English audio, but we choose to watch it with English audio and English subtitles to see just how much they differ.)
Here are some quotes from the subtitles...see if you can figure out what they are actually trying to say:

1) "My affirmation, judge's adult!"
2) "My client brains doesn't clearly have a little."
3) "Her meeting elephant throws hand grenade still shot you."
4) "Do I ask whether you likes to satirize a person or not?"
5) "Open what fun."

A clue...this is a prison show and some of these quotes happen within a courtroom, that's all you're getting. Good luck!